Pitt/Penn State/Beano And Paterno

Those who have read these posts over the years, have seen occasional hypothetical, “after life” conversations.

Here is one that would be pretty accurate, no matter the circumstances of their meeting.

It involves my late friend and everything Pitt (Pittsburgh University) Beano Cook and a man to be honored in an “on earth” event (Saturday September 17th) of some controversy, on the exact 50th anniversary of his first game as Penn State head football coach, Joe Paterno.

I never met Paterno, but based on a televised, I guess, “surprise to Paterno, meeting” with Beano and recollections regarding Beano, some of the below might take place, “above.”

Beano: I can not believe Pitt is a 5 point favorite in tomorrow’s game vs Penn State. That would not be the case, if you were still coaching. If I were alive, I would be bugging that Andy B.

Paterno: First of all, you always over rated our team and especially me. One of my famous linebackers, Dennis Onkotz saw through that and told Andy B  (whomever? that is).

However, I always liked you and I am so glad you were grateful, it was me, who greeted you upon your death.

Beano: I would have preferred my mother, for two reasons. One is I love her so much, the second is when I saw you, I was not sure, but still confident, I made it to the better place.

Paterno: I could say which place is that, or did you? Better yet, I told you that your obituary was in the New York Times, a lifetime goal for you.

Beano: I know there is no need for money in this place, but I wish I could take the points with your Penn State. I would hope Pitt wins but does not cover the spread.

Paterno: We are running “long,” even for this place. You still have to “clean it up,” but close this, with your line about your root and bet both winning.

Beano: I always said it is like going on a date with a great woman ( I can talk this stuff, “they” say you can not, but to me, what bugged me about you and you truly were a great coach, was that you were at times, sanctimonious, but in reality each of us was with flaws, a part of and great, positive illustration of a “time of craft”) having her “really like you and show it” and then ALSO pick up the dinner check.